Last week was not a great week in my head.
The headache I woke up with Monday faded away before noon, which was a great relief.
Tuesday was okay.
Wednesday started out fine, but by lunchtime the noise was starting up in my head and it became that question of whether to take Relpax or risk the consequences -- a question I had to answer before eating lunch.
If I time it just right, often I can take it just in time so that it's bad enough so I am certain it was necessary but not so far gone that it won't do any good. I've gotten pretty good at gauging that, generally. On Wednesday I decided to take it, and I think it was justified.
It made me feel really, really sleepy as it sometimes does, but I managed to get through the day.
Just as it was taking effect I was interviewing two geology professors at Lamar University. When it hits me hard like that I often wonder if other people notice something odd about me -- like maybe they wonder if I'm on drugs, which I am, but not maybe the way they think.
Anyway, I got through the day and did most of what I meant to do.
Thursday, by late afternoon, my head began to ache.
Generally, I try to avoid taking Relpax two days in a row, as I think that's too often. And so far, it hasn't often been necessary (that is, since I got off the cycle of rebound headaches, which is the reason I limit my use of Relpax in the first place).
Anyway, out of sheer desperation, I took a whooooole bunch of ibuprofen -- about six 200 milligram tablets. It made me feel a little weird, but miraculously, it seemed to do the trick.
Who knows -- maybe the headache would have faded away on its own.
Friday was okay.
But Saturday, I woke up with a headache -- and I had to work.
I thought about trying the ibuprofen again, but I didn't have any at home. My assignment was to cover a historic gun exhibition in Orange (about 20 miles from Beaumont, where I live) so I got ready for work and drove over there, stopping at a convenience store for ibuprofen. I took five, and I think it might have blunted the progress for a little while. Hard to say.
But two hours later, it seemed to be building again.
I left the museum where the exhibit was being held and went back out into the heat and got in my un-air conditioned car.
I felt afraid to take the drug (because of the side effects) and afraid not to (for obvious reasons).
I looked around me, trying to read the landscape -- maybe it seems stupid to believe in signs -- it's not exactly that I think mystical messages are planted for my edification, it's more that I think my subconscious will use the objects and activities going on around me to help me navigate. Either way, maybe it sounds goofy.
Anyway, I saw nothing much that stood out to me one way or the other and drove on apathetically.
It occurred to me that the consequences of doing nothing could be extremely painful and at the same time, I realized that I WANTED to take Relpax.
So I did.
And again, I think it was the choice that most helped me get through the day I had planned.
Part of my day Saturday was training a new reporter on the duties of the Saturday shift, and I'm pretty sure that would not have gone well with a raging headache -- much less a full-blown migraine.
And this very green rookie reporter would not have been able to cope on her own with the Saturday routine.
So, all well and good.
But I woke this morning with a faint pain in my head.
Nothing major, but waking with pain is usually a poor start to a day.
I have an obligation later today -- but I don't think it would be appropriate for me to take Relpax again.
I was doing so well there for a while.
Granted, this week my period started, which makes it more likely for me to have headaches, but I don't always have FOUR the week of my period.
It seems to go in cycles that way -- but when I get into a bad patch like this, I'm always afraid it's never going to end -- that this is just going to be my life from now on.
It's especially worrisome because, from what I've read, migraine is not considered a disability. Which seems odd to me.
True, for many people, they are not a daily or even weekly occurrence. But when they are, they make it very difficult to work and be productive.
I'm not really sure how this fits in with my ambitious mission statement of finding solutions and cures and all that.
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